It seems ironic that when I am at the lowest point in my personal love life - true friends tell me they wish me well in my ordeal. They wish me to be strong and that they are just there should I need someone to listen to me and my worries. One tends to forget the bonds we have with people that are always there for us, never forgetting us. They remember us always, we just sometimes tend to forget the old friendships and always searching for new ones.
These last week I have seen friends that have expressed sorrow for what I am going through. They feel sad that I am sad. They want to give me courage because I am down. They want to cheek me up because I am "not smiley face". They tell me that the answer to life's troubles are just in our hearts, we just have to listen to it with an open mind. My friends are true to the friendship we have forged all these years, I was just remiss in my part in keeping in touch and making sure I nuture those friendships. They understand me. I am humbled by their love for me. They are unselfish, non-judgemental and supportive of the biggest life lesson I am about to learn.
To all my female friends they know what an ordeal this up hill battle I am against. They know I have it in me to get through this. They believe in me. For whatever I might have done to get myself in this crossroads of my life, they know that I am responsible and will hold myself accountable for whatever I have done. I have to face that squarely now.
Thank you to all of you out there, my friends both new and old. Thank you for believing in me. Now the biggest task of all time is to get me to be convinced that I can do this, and take that step towards healing. Though the pain to raw right now, there is no other time to start than now.
Tomorrow might just be a day too late.
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